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A Letter For Jonghyun


Kim Jonghyun passed away on December 18th, 2017 at the age of 27. Known simply as Jonghyun, he was one of the five member group, SHINee. Jonghyun's distinct voice and passionate performances helped SHINee make their mark in the kpop industry. He also was an accomplished songwriter and composer, contributing not only his own solo songs, but also to songs for SHINee, Lee Hi, EXO and IU.

All five members of SHINee - Taemin, Jonghyun, Onew, Key and Minho - are part of the golden era of Kpop. Their work set the stage for future generations of artists, like BTS and EXO. An idol to many idols, Jonghyun's death shocked the artist community and fans worldwide.

His death, which has been ruled a suicide, has shone a blinding light on the downfalls of South Korea's mental health industry. In a country where the suicide rate has steadily been increasing since the 90's and depression is a common, but stigmatized illness, the death of an adored idol like Jonghyun has shaken the community.

For now, we at WKP would like to honor Jonghyun in the best way we can. In the days since his death, we have been sharing favorite moments and favorite songs of Jonghyun, remembering him as the perfectly imperfect person he was. Fandoms, not only Shawols, are using online forums to mourn together and to try to make sense of this loss.

WKP invited guest contributor, Brianna, to pen some words about Jonghyun, which we have shared below. As a Shawol, Brianna hopes to reach out and connect with others who may feel the same way about this devastating loss.

 

[This was written on December 19th]

I don't even know really what to say. I've thought all day about what can I possibly say. Nothing seems sufficient.

I've been following SHINee since 2009. I watched them go from awkward, adorable babies to awkward, beautiful men. They never failed to make me smile, to laugh, and to feel good about myself.

There was a time in my undergraduate years where I lived in a dark place. I would sit in my room and just cry and cry. I didn't understand why. It took me far too long to realize that nasty cloud of feelings I carried around was depression.

I grasped at anything in these moments to try and feel better. I felt so lonely and empty. When I was at my lowest point with my thoughts, contemplating my own life, my worth and reason - I turned to SHINee.

I wasn't a big follower of Kpop during this time, but I did always keep up with SHINee no matter what. I listened to their music, I watched them dance, I laughed at their variety. When I was feeling sad and depressed, my light was SHINee.

No matter how low I felt, they could always make me smile. Especially during Blue Night radio, Jonghyun's calm voice and words to live by advice were enough to give me peace. He always knew what to say and it saved me. Shinee, Jonghyun...saved me. And my heart is so heavy that I couldn't do the same.

They have brought me immeasurable joy and happiness that I can't repay. Of course as a fan, I wish I could have done more. I ache knowing how terrible that dark place is and that Jonghyun suffered from it. I love them so very much and they will always hold a spot in my Shawol heart.

I could write an essay more but I just wanted to spew out the general gist of it. Nothing I say could ever be adequate enough to express my feelings and of those who love you so dearly.

My sweet darling Jonghyun, I hope you are at peace. You worked hard and you did well. You did so well.

- Brianna

 

Brianna and WKP also came together to choose some of the many great Jonghyun/SHINee moments. Here are just a few that resonated with us...

SHINee - Juliette

Their first win to this is just really memorable. Jonghyun cried SO HARD because it was his first contribution as a writer to SHINee. He truly had a sensitive soul.

- Brianna

 

SHINee - Internet War

As an idol, Jonghyun was unique in being extremely open minded and outspoken in his beliefs. He was unafraid of being bold. 'Internet War' is one of my favorite Jonghyun moments, as he radiates confidence, sexuality, power, and rage. **Warning - above video may induce sweating, swooning, fainting, etc**

- Kerry

 

SHINee - Excuse Me, Miss

The live version of this song is amazing. SHINee is truly a cut above the rest in terms of performance. The song itself is a classic R&B tune, a style that Jonghyun especially excels at. His part at the bridge can send shivers down your spine.

- Brianna

 

Jonghyun - Y Si Fuera Ella

Jonghyun performed a Korean version of 'Y Si Fuera Ella,' originally sung in Spanish by Alejandro Sanz. This particular song and its stage is on another level. His performance is brimming with emotion. Clad all in white, Jonghyun ends the song in a pool of 'blood,' after being brought to his knees. If nothing else, this performance showcases Jonghyun's immense vocal talent and great love of singing.

- Brianna

 

You did well, you worked hard. Rest in peace, Jonghyun.

If you are experiencing thoughts of suicide, please do not hesitate to reach out to these resources. Please remember, there is one person somewhere who loves you more than you love yourself.

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